Well it happened..

I knew it woudl , I have felt so ill, I knew it woudl come back. No-one believed me, they all said it's just you being anxious.
Tuesday 17 November - my death sentence, 2- 5 years max, probably less, in fact definotely less. This week consultant said to Mark 5 years would be very lucky.

I am in such pain in my heart, I don't know what to do. One weekend before suicidal, one week after too scared to die, to much to do, too much pain to leave other people.

Strange life, two days after I did my presentation in front of my fellow students and amzed them all. Appeared confident and they coudl hear me... and did it without looking at screen or notes. What an Oscar winning performance, inside I am dying.